


It started with a whisper...

by cardinalgirl75



Series: Across Two Lifetimes [5]
Category: A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms, A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: F/M, Silliness galore, This Author has no excuse for this, although jaime and brienne are the relationship under discussion, but I couldn't resist!!, excessive use of exclamation marks and capital letters, there is nothing but crack and fluff here, they don't actually appear here, this is absolutely positively the last part of the soulmate AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-01
Updated: 2020-11-01
Packaged: 2021-03-08 21:42:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27333619
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cardinalgirl75/pseuds/cardinalgirl75
Summary: What happened when everyone found out about Jaime and Brienne?
Relationships: Jaime Lannister/Brienne of Tarth
Series: Across Two Lifetimes [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1980070
Comments: 59
Kudos: 166





	It started with a whisper...

**Author's Note:**

> I truly have no excuse for this, except to say that I was inspired by a Tumblr post by samirant, who expounded a bit on everyone's reaction to Jaime and Brienne getting together at the end of Backpfeifengesicht. This ends the adventure for this story--thanks to everyone who's been part of it to this point!
> 
> Unbeta'd, so all mistakes are mine.
> 
> Story title from "Everybody Talks" by Neon Trees.

**PPayne:** Mr. Baratheon-Tyrell, we have a situation.

**Mr. B-T:** Situation?

**PPayne:** Yes. Ms. Tarth met someone today at the book signing and now she doesn’t want to leave Lannisport until tomorrow morning. I told her that we might not make the early book signing in Oldtown if she does this, but she says she’ll be fine.

**Mr. B-T:** She met someone?

**PPayne:** Yeah, some guy came up to her at the book signing and said hello, and she got all funny. They stared at each other forever until me and the manager asked him to leave.

**Mr. B-T:** That’s not like Brienne.

**PPayne:** They didn’t even say anything. Just stared. And he didn’t leave, he waited for her to finish up.

**Mr. B-T:** Strange. All right. Give her a little leeway, tell her that the latest you guys can stay in Lannisport is 6 pm. Brienne’s responsible. She’ll agree.

**PPayne:** OK.

~*~*~*~*~*

**Podrick Payne:** MR. BARATHEON-TYRELL, WE HAVE A SITUATION!!!

 **Me:** You don’t need to shout, Podrick, but what’s wrong?

**Podrick Payne:** I can’t find Ms. Tarth. She disappeared with that guy. The store manager says he saw them leave but doesn’t know what direction they went in. And I tried calling her phone but it goes straight to voicemail, so I think she turned it off.

**Me:** Don’t panic. Did you get the guy’s name?

**Podrick Payne:** Yes. It’s Jaime. No last name, just Jaime. And the way she said it was all weird. Do you think he used some sort of hypnotism on her to get her to go away like that?

**Me:** No. What else. What does he look like? What was he wearing? Did he have any tattoos or scars or anything?

**Podrick Payne:** Uh…tall. Taller than me, not as tall as her. Blond hair. Don’t know about his eyes. Wasn’t paying attention to his clothes—I’m sorry, sir!!

**Podrick Payne:** But he only had one hand. I remember that now. When he picked his book up from the table, he bobbled it with his left hand and steadied it with his right, and I saw that the right one wasn’t real.

**Me:** One hand?

~*~*~*~*~*

**Me:** Why would Brienne run off with some guy she’s never met just because he’s only got one hand? Does she have some fetish for one-handed guys? Is that why she cut off Kingslayer’s hand in the last book?

 **Margaery:** I don’t even know where to begin with those questions.

**Me:** TRY! Because I have a bestselling author who has two book signings tomorrow, and she’s nowhere to be found.

**Margaery:** Okay, okay. Let me call her.

**Me:** Do you think I’d have texted you if the solution was as simple as CALL HER? She’s got her phone turned off.

**Margaery:** What, do you think she’s been kidnapped by some one-handed guy? She’s not exactly some simpering helpless maiden, you know. If she didn’t want to go off with him, she wouldn’t have. Was he hot?

**Me:** How the fuck would I know? I wasn’t there!

**Margaery:** I wouldn’t care how many hands a guy had if he was hot and knew what to do with what he had.

**Me:** MARGAERY. Focus.

**Margaery:** I’m sorry, but she hasn’t texted me today. Is there anything else you know about this guy?

**Me:** Yeah. He’s tall, blond, and named Jaime. That and the hand thing are all I’ve got.

**Margaery:** Jaime?

~*~*~*~*~*

**Me:** Tyrion, it’s Margaery Tyrell. What the hells is your brother doing with my friend?

 **Tyrion Lannister:** Any number of things, I imagine.

**Tyrion Lannister:** I presume we’re talking about Brienne Tarth.

**Me:** YES, WE’RE TALKING ABOUT BRIENNE TARTH!! The person you oh-so-conveniently called me about last night. And now today, some blond one-handed guy named Jaime shows up and kidnaps her from the book signing after I told you where she was going to be. How many one-handed guys named Jaime are there in the world? I only know one.

**Tyrion Lannister:** Kidnapped?

**Me:** Either that or he used some dark magic on her, because she’s gone without a word or a trace and her cell phone’s off. She never does that, not even when she should.

**Me:** Tyrion?

**Me:** Hello?? Tyrion?!?!

**Tyrion Lannister:** Hello. This is Tyrion’s wife Tysha. Tyrion’s laughing too hard to respond, sorry about that. But Jaime didn’t kidnap Brienne.

**Tyrion Lannister:** He’s her soulmate.

**Tyrion Lannister:** He figured it out last night when I told him about her books. He recognized the story as being theirs from their past life. Her being in Lannisport was a coincidence, but it made it a lot easier for him to find her.

**Tyrion Lannister:** So if she’s not responding, that’s probably why.

**Me:** Oh.

**Me:** Past life? What past life???

~*~*~*~*~*

**Me:** Ren, I wouldn’t expect to hear from Brienne for the rest of the day. In fact, I think you might need to reschedule the rest of her book tour. Tell them she’s got the flu or something.

 **Renly:** Why?

**Me:** The one-handed guy is her soulmate. And Sansa Clegane has a lot of explaining to do.

~*~*~*~*~*

**Margie T:** You evil bitch!

 **Me:** What?

**Margie T:** She’s been writing about her soulmate, hasn’t she? And you knew!

**Me:** Who, Brienne?

**Margie T:** How many people do we know write books? Kingslayer is her soulmate, her stories are their life together in the past, and YOU KNEW!!

**Me:** What makes you think I knew?

**Margie T:** Even if I didn’t know you knew, you didn’t deny it just now. You asked me how I knew you knew, instead of asking what made me think Kingslayer was her soulmate. So you knew. You knew and you didn’t tell me!

**Me:** She made me pinky swear! I can’t break the promise of a pinky swear!!

**Margie T:** A pinky swear? What are you two, fifteen?

**Margie T:** Wait. YOU’VE KNOWN SINCE SHE WAS FIFTEEN AND YOU DIDN’T TELL ME?????

**Me:** If I tell you that you’re the most beautiful woman in the world, and I’d totally be into you if it weren’t for Sandor, would you forget that last bit?

**Margie T:** Don’t distract me.

**Margie T:** But thank you.

**Me:** How did you figure it out?

**Margie T:** She had to confide in someone, and it wasn’t me. So that left you. And you’re supposed to tell me everything, pinky swear or not.

**Me:** Not that. How did you figure out that she’s writing about her soulmate?

**Margie T:** You mean there’s something I know that you don’t?

**Me:** Margaery don’t make me beg.

**Margie T:** If it weren’t for Sandor…

**Me:** No seriously, how did you figure it out?

**Margie T:** Oh I don’t know. But it may have been when this one-handed guy named Jaime showed up at her book signing today and swept her off her feet AFTER his brother called me last night to find out who she was.

**Margie T:** And then his brother’s wife confirmed that he found her through her books because she was writing about their past together and they were soulmates.

**Margie T:** Sansa?

**Margie T:** Sansa???

~*~*~*~*~*

**Hound:** I don’t know what the hells you told my wife, but she’s been screaming “he found her” for the past three minutes. Who is he, and who did he find?

 **Me:** Brienne’s soulmate turned up at her book signing today. He found her because of her books. Did you know that her books are about their past lives?

**Hound:** Yes. Sansa told me when the first one came out.

**Me:** Hmpf. Pinky swear, my ass. 

**Hound:** Soulmate trumps pinky swears.

**Me:** I hate you both.

~*~*~*~*~*

_Texts left on Brienne’s phone, which she didn’t check for twenty-four hours:_

 **Podrick Payne:** Ms. Tarth, please get in touch with me as soon as possible. I’m concerned. That man looked nice enough but you can never tell with people. I’m sure Ramsay Snow looked like a nice guy, too.

**Podrick Payne:** I’m sure he’s already texted you, but I had to let Mr. Baratheon-Tyrell know you were missing. Sorry. Please get in touch to let me know you’re okay or if maybe you need to be rescued.

~*~

**Renly:** Brienne, I don’t know where you are, but get in touch with me ASAP. I mean it! You have two book signings tomorrow!

**Renly:** DON’T MAKE ME SIC MARGAERY ON YOU!!

**Renly:** So Margaery tells me this guy is your soulmate. Dammit.

**Renly:** Okay. We’ll see about rescheduling the signings you have tomorrow, but that’s all I can give you. If we skip out on Harrenhal they won’t forgive us for YEARS. So call me. Please.

**Renly:** In all seriousness, Brienne, I’m happy you found him. You’re a wonderful woman and you deserve the best. This guy is the best, isn’t he? Because if he’s like Kingslayer, then we need to have a chat. 

~*~

**Margaery:** Renly tells me you took off with a guy named Jaime. Is it Jaime Lannister? His brother Tyrion called me last night to find out about you, though he didn’t say why. It had to be for Jaime. I’m texting Tyrion in a minute to find out, but if it is that Jaime, and he’s as hot as I heard, then ignore all other messages you get. You get on that man and ride him for all you’re worth!

**Margaery:** Just so you know, I’m never forgiving you for telling Sansa and not telling me about this whole dreaming-of-your-soulmate business.

**Margaery:** Having said that, I’m absolutely thrilled that he found you. And that he’s Jaime Lannister. I finally found a pic and YOWZA!! You’re so lucky.

~*~

**Sansa:** HE FOUND YOU!! OMG OMG OMG OMG!!!

**Sansa:** OMG I’m so happy for you, B. Call me when you get these messages!!! I love you!!! And I know I’ll love him, too!!!

~*~

**Sandor:** So you found your soulmate. I think I remember him from the night I met Sansa. Let him know that if he still wants to play a game of pool for that sword he was telling me about, I’m available.

**Sandor:** And never let him forget that he’s a lucky fucker to get you.

~*~*~*~*~*

_Texts left on Jaime’s phone, which he didn’t check for three days:_

 **Tyrion:** Congratulations, _lekia_. May you be as happy with Brienne as I am with Tysha. Since I suspect you’re going to Sunspear, you must check out the food at this place called Ellaria’s. They do an amazing Dornish/Pentoshi fusion that once you’ve had, you’ll never forget. All my love to Brienne, and I look forward to meeting her when you come home. 

**Tyrion:** I let Aunt Genna know in case she tried to get in touch with you. I figured you wouldn’t mind.

**Tyrion:** Tysha’s made me promise I won’t tell Father or Cersei, but would you mind if I dropped just a tiny little hint?

**Tyrion:** Seriously, you have no idea how hard it is for me to sit on this. My fingers are itching to grab the phone and text them.

**Tyrion:** Sample text: “Dear Father/Cersei, your efforts to eradicate Jaime’s soulmate from the existential plane have been foiled, as she has finally appeared on the physical plane.” What do you think? I could send it off with one touch. The sounds of their agony would fill King’s Landing for HOURS and leave a little glow in my heart.

**Tyrion:** And since you’ll be in Sunspear, you’ll be able to hear it better than I will!

**Tyrion:** This is Tysha. IGNORE YOUR BROTHER. He will say nothing to them. I told him not to send the message to Genna, but too late.

**Tyrion:** And surely he’s exaggerating how they’d react. You haven’t seen either of them in years.

**Tyrion:** I need to have a conversation with my wife of just how miserable those two made your childhood. Not as bad as mine, but close.

**Tyrion:** And about how neither of them ever forgives what they perceive as a slight or betrayal.

**Tyrion:** Tysha’s threatening to throw my phone in the pool if I send any more texts. But seriously, Jaime—

**Tysha:** I have taken your brother’s phone. He will not get it back for at least twenty-four hours or until he can overcome this insane urge he has to antagonize the rest of your family. Love to Brienne, and tell her I’m her biggest fan.

~*~

**Aunt Genna:** What’s this message I got from Tyrion telling me that you found the girl at last?

**Aunt Genna:** Jaime, I expect you to text me as soon as you get this.

**Aunt Genna:** Just a warning. I was having dinner with some of the family when Tyrion’s message came through. Tywin, Cersei, and Robert were there, and I made the mistake of telling them what had happened.

**Aunt Genna:** You can imagine their reaction.

~*~

**Daven Lannister:** Hey, coz, congrats on finding the soulmate! You should’ve seen the explosion when Aunt G spilled the beans. Actually, you CAN see it, or most of it, because I had my phone in hand when Aunt G told them. Don’t think I’ve been that fast to switch to video recording in my life.

**Daven Lannister:** *sent file: LannisterFireworks.mp4*

**Daven Lannister:** I’d lay low for a while if I were you. But then I figure that was the plan in the first place. Best to the soulmate—hey, Tyrion said she writes those Blue books! Could you get some signed copies for me? I’ve got a lady friend who’s really into the series.

~*~

**Aunt Genna:** Daven tells me he sent you a video of their reaction. Honestly, that boy has never been anything but trouble. Sorry about that, but I’m sure you’ll forgive me for spoiling your news.

**Aunt Genna:** : And hello to your friend Wench. If you still want to give her the Lego sword you made for her when you were five, I have it stored away in my attic.


End file.
